Empty Nest!

My wife and I finally have an empty nest. A bit quiet, but it is certainly nice. We helped my son, his wife and my granddaughter move several hours away where he is in Army AIT training. He won't have a lot of time, but they wanted to be closer, after being apart for several months during basic training.

Now I just have to finish fixing the house up without breaking the bank! We had a fixer upper we never fixed. :) We are fixing a lot of it now.

Brad

Focus

I am someone who is interested in many different things. While this can be a great thing, since I can be truly interested in what many people are talking about, it can also be a problem when I have to decide where to spend limited time. My life sometimes feels like a commercial I heard about a faithful dog (golden retriever?) that was doing his master's bidding, but then got distracted by a squirrel. Our information age brings up many different, interesting things all the time. Staying focused is incredibly hard.

I suppose this is just another example of a great strength being a (potential) great weakness. The same thing is good and bad, sometimes at the same time.

No solutions here, just some thoughts.

Brad

I am reading Liberal Socialism by Bernard Goldberg now. Its argument is that modern liberalism is really based on the same foundation fascism, with literal effective different between socialism/communism and fascism, since both call for the state to control all aspects of life.

He has an interesting point that one of the reasons that it is hard to pinpoint exactly what is fascism is because it varies greatly based on where it is. Fascism in Italy was very different from that in Germany and from that elsewhere.

I will try to post a more complete review later.

It is interesting how many people who are "liberal" today want to tell people how to live and think. They would raise a stink if the "Religious Right" did so on a moral issue, but they have no problem heading a crusade against handguns, smoking or even how people think. This is worth further thought later, though I am sure to stir up some controversy whatever I say.

It is sad how so many supposedly tolerant people are very intolerant of those who disagree. Why did I get off on this rant? Because they often freely throw out the term fascist for those they disagree with. This is following the trend started by Stalin and hypocritically continued today. Sure, some "on the right" want to control some things, but they are pikers compared to today's liberal. We have to force good, at whatever the cost!

Even Bush went along the path when he called for "no child to be left behind." We can't make heaven on earth, but we sure will try....

Brad

Always the Values....

Marty Nemko makes a few good suggestions for Republicans in a recent post. His idea on pushing accountability on education is reasonable and I definitely like the idea of government spending less money, but why must some people always shove the social goals along with less government involvement in life?

Ironically, many people who oppose anyone pushing their values have no problem when it comes to forcing their own values on others, in this case in the areas of abortion and redefining marriage.

In the former, it will always be an issue of freedom of the most innocent and their right to live, whatever someone may decide is their right to demand. While I could see why some might argue in favor of abortion when a the child is not viable outside the womb, but I find it incredible that people can think that allowing such destruction after a child is viable would ever be consistent with a society that protects the rights of the innocent. And what kind of society is one where the one with the power is the only one who gets to make the rules?

Ironically, while I feel very strongly about this, I also realize this issue will not be resolved any time soon and that pushing through laws either way is a fruitless cause. Nothing will be resolved until hearts change. We rely too much on so-called law today. Attitudes are far more important and I suspect we have a lot farther to fall before we will get anywhere close to a truly tolerant and life-affirming society.

The other issue is that government should not be in the business of defining what marriage is. If someone wants to marry their cat, let them, just don't mandate requirements on other supporting that decision. You can do what you want, but why must others sanction it? Is any side in the "culture wars" really better than any other?

Giving government the power to force things in these contentious debates just ensure more contention, it won't solve them.

Brad

Finding Your Niche

I have been thinking a lot about my niche lately. What can I really do better than anyone else and get paid well while doing it? Money was less of a concern when I was younger and I wanted to work in the games field, but more independent. While I would love to have a well paying games gig now, it is much less likely since I have been out of the field for several years.

The game playing, reviewing and some developing didn't pay all that well, but I sure had fun. I was probably one of the more prolific reviewers at the time, though I don't know how I would do today. My tastes certainly vary from the modern offerings, especially since blood and guts seems to be shoved into just about anything.

I am loving my current work in the information security area, but that is just part of the picture. I tend to pursue something with a passion for a while and then go toward something else. Right now it is learning about infosec and getting a bunch of certifications along the way. I have several SANS/GIAC certifications and will be taking the CISM in June and the CISSP is likely in August (finally). I did get the CSSLP based on my experience, though secure development is definitely both a good fit for me given my experience and what I am digging into.

What will come next? Good question. How can you make really good money and get paid to write all the time? That is the big question. I can communicate, a very valuable skill. Having some technical chops is great too, though I always want more.

My big quest now is figuring out what skills I need to build in the next few years so I can have a much more flexible lifestyle in the future. Figuring that out is the toughest thing of all.

Which gets me back to my point: Finding your niche can be hard, especially if you want to do something unique with that niche. I am confident I will find something unique, I always have. I just want to find it sooner rather than later!

Why have you read this far? Boredom would be one option, but my bet is you are facing similar questions. If I had complete answers, I would already be following it. Though I am convinced that pursuing things with a passion and making yourself the best you can be is still the best thing you can do. The problems come in when picking what to pursue. Too many options means it is impossible to pursue them all.

I will write more later as I think this through.

Brad

Making a test post from my cell phone/PDA.

The Risk of Discussing Your True Thoughts

We live in a very wired world. In the past, it was much easier to separate your work and "other" persona. Now, it is much harder to do that. Take my blogging here. I am sure I have earned some scorn from some because of my thoughts here (or would if they noticed them), but is that just a price I have to pay? Do I need to squelch my contribution to the public discourse of any controversial issues since it could keep me from getting a future job?

As you can tell, especially using this blogging site, all my blogs ultimately link to the others. Someone who reads my Brad on Security blog could also chain here. In some ways I really don't care. I have always marched to my own tune. I do good work, but I don't fit in a mold very well (another problem I am facing while pondering my future career direction in the other blog).

This makes me not want to work someplace that would discount my very strong technical skills merely because of my thoughts posted here. I don't know that it has happened yet, but it is certainly a distinct possibility since a few of the views I hold strongly are certainly against the spoken norm.

I do believe more people agree with me than will speak up, but it is quite possible that a potential future boss would read here and decide I must truly be ignorant in spite of my experience, education and certifications, because I don't believe everything we see in the world is a result of blind chance.

So be it. I could try to purge things I suppose, but that would not be all that fruitful, since the record is out there and Google remembers forever. :)

I also don't want to live in a world where I can't express myself. I may keep some thoughts more private, since I am not independently wealthy at this point, but I refuse to stuff it all just because it might bother someone. If you can't handle a strong thinker, then I don't want to work for you, plain and simple.

I remain convinced that I can add enough value enough places that the risk is acceptable.

Brad

Dinner Impossible is Back!

I normally hold out for complete truth in all that I do and I expect it from others, but I am very glad that Dinner: Impossible on the Food Network now has Robert Irvine back on the show. He was definitely the spark that made the show as good as it was. The substitute (Michael Symon?) just didn't have the same spark and dynamic presence. After all, it is more entertainment than it is really about cooking.

I did see that it was no surprise that Robert's past lying cost him dearly, almost permanently. My own two sons (now both adults) have been known to stretch things a bit, telling some really fancy tales in the past, so I could definitely understand a bit about what Robert did. I can also understand why he was initially canned, but he was the show, so doing without him meant the show was dead.

I still would not be likely go into business with him, but I am glad to have an entertaining show to watch with my wife again! Hopefully he pulls off the same standard of the first season!

Driving Yourself to Achieve

I see two different kinds of people today. Those who are driven to accomplish something and those who just float along through life, at best. While neither group is always successful at its task and a few of the floaters end up doing well in spite of themselves, the first group is much more certain to accomplish something of value.

I am firmly in the first camp, driven to achieve something, though I am often driven to achieve too many things, which can also be a problem with reaching my goals. Still, I would rather be driven than not. Too many people go through life complaining that they just don't have time to do things. Their day job, family life, or something else that is vitally important takes up too much of their mental effort and time in their eyes, justifying their lack of effort.

Clearly you can only work with the time you have, but most people can free up some time to make a positive change, yet many will not. In fact, they will often argue with you about how much they cannot accomplish anything. Even putting that effort into accomplishing the goals would make a change by itself.

I have a lot of thoughts jumbling through my head right now on this, so I am going to stop here, but I wanted to get started actively driving this blog and this seems like a great topic to ponder and write about.

Using a PDA is an Interesting Experience

I finally took the plunge and got a PDA. I had been with Sprint for at least 4 years, but they don't have in network coverage where my mother lives in rural Iowa, so I had to go. Neither did AT&T or I would probably have an iPhone now. Instead, I got the new and high rated Samsung Omnia.

It is a decent phone, though I am still learning my way around it.

My biggest challenge now is to know how to enter podxycasts and RSS feeds. Neither seem to have a way to paste in an address. This makes it very hard to edit them. I also can't figure out how to open and/or edit an OPML file, so I am stuck until I get back home.

It is sure a pain typing thisvin one character at a time. I can go a bit faster now, though well short of my normal typing speed! Hopefully this will help me blog more though.

Twitter Account

I decided to set myself up on Twitter today. My account is bradtalk. My name is not available, but it does not appear to be used, so perhaps I can change it to just bradandrews in the future.

For now, it remains http://www.twitter.com/bradtalk

Let the banality begin!

Keeping Your Focus

One thing I really struggle with in life is to stay focused on just one thing. One the one hand, this ability to jump between things enables me to keep many things going at the same time. On the other hand, it can be really hard when a dedicated focus is required.

My life sometimes reminds me of the people who would spin plates on top of poles on a TV variety show. Things worked well when everything started up, but it would continually fall into peril as plate after plate started slowing down and wobbling, threatening to fall on the ground and make a serious mess. In spite of this threat, the spinner would somehow manage to always get back to the plate just before it fell, saving the day.

This often feels like my life, applying spin to another plate to keep from making a huge mess. While energizing at times (and boy can it be energizing), it can also seem quite discouraging at times, when the end of spinning plates never comes. While that is not accurate, it often seems that way things can run in life, at least for those of us with the ability to focus on many things. This ability to focus on many things often leads us to focus on "just one more thing" before being satisfied.

I am not sure what the complete solution is here. Just saying to "focus on fewer things" is nice in theory, but is highly unlikely to happen. Perhaps I will figure it out someday, though I expect I will be spinning plates until I am no longer able to do so. Not doing so would be far more frustrating anyway!

Brad

Instilling a Love of Learning in Others

One of my biggest "failures" with my own children is that none of them seems to have the passion for learning I have. While I can be a big slacker at times, I am constantly trying to learn something new. Right now I am putting a lot of effort into learning topics related to my career in information security, but I am also trying to learn more about project management, low carb and low glycemic cooking, business in the area, etc.

Unfortunately, I only have so many hours in the day. And I am the only one pushing it, so I can't even feed off others in my family. Sure, they think they know it all, but they need to do some research to validate things and complement their existing knowledge.

This is a mixed post and is not coming out as easy as I thought. I wanted to pose the general question of how to motivate others, but I also wanted to share the frustration of wanting to know more than is possible.

We really need a way to hook people like this up. I would have loved to have someone who would have stirred me on when I was a teen myself (at least I think so). While I did some things well (Eagle Scout, etc.), I didn't have anyone pushing me on in academics. I often wonder if I could have excelled more if someone had taken that level of interest.

This makes me wonder if we could hook such people up. Perhaps such a system exists already, but if I never found out about it, how many others are missing it?

Brad

Have You Improved Yourself Today?

Many people get stuck where they are in life. While this can often be wrapped in terms like "being content", it is often just an excuse to be unmotivated. While you should certainly be content throughout life, you should never grow complacent.

Always ask yourself if you are doing all you can to advance the skills you have. Aim to learn at least one new thing each day. While most of these should be something significant, even small minor steps will ultimately take you to a better place than where you are today. It will also help you be a better steward of the skills and talents you have been given in this life. Note that significant things can often be small!

Avoid the pit that says only large achievements really mean anything. While this sounds great, it will almost certainly result in you not doing anything. Each small step is one step closer to a significantly better place.

You will have to determine what is significant for you. That may take some time, but it is worth figuring out. You also don't have to limit your steps to a single area. Some focus can be helpful to keep on track, but occasionally taking on a different learning goal may ultimately help you reach all your goals quicker. It will provide some needed variety in your life and your success in one area is almost certain to spill over into other areas. Good feelings tend to follow good feelings!

Don't let the size of the goal deter you either. Take a single step toward your goal and you will be one step closer!

Brad

Fitting Desires Into Life

Fitting all my desires into my life has long been one of my strongest challenges. I am interested in so many areas that I often get overwhelmed when I try to focus on just one. I want to know it all, but that is clearly just not possible. Still, I need to keep going. You only get to the end of the journey by taking each individual step. Making sure the steps are all headed the right way can be a big challenge, but what would life be without challenges.

Hopefully I can stir up some interesting thoughts in this blog over the coming months....

Word of Faith Leaders in Trouble?

Anyone who watches any news is sure to know that several prominent Word of Faith leaders are being investigated by the Senate for excessive spending and other "crimes that will make the politician doing the investigation look really good for exposing."

I would note that I grew as a Christian in the Word of Faith movement and I still find many of the core principles to be completely consistent with the Bible (contrary to the claims of many Christian leaders). That said, I had a growing discomfort with the ostentatiousness exhibited by many in the movement that became even more pronounced with the Money Cometh message's growth in the late 1990s.

A big problem for me personally was that money wasn't coming, or at least it wasn't staying. It flowed out about as fast as it came in, and it was coming in at a good pace during those years! The main reason for this was that I didn't tightly control my spending and focus intently on getting out of debt. Instead I focused on living high on the hog and enjoying life, a key tenet the movement pushed during those years. Of course, getting and staying out of debt was always a core principle, but it was drowned out by the idea of really enjoying life.

I am firmly convinced that the generosity of my wife and I is what kept us from serious bad times during those years, but I lament how much better I could have done if I had instead focused intently on debt reduction and elimination.

As I noted in a previous post, I am once again seeking to focus on that goal, but I face the common trouble most in my generation hit: consumption! It is a lot harder to change habits than many think.

Getting back to the current scandal, I would note that this has been going on for many years, why is anyone surprised? While I have serious issues with the flagrant waste of the things given to these ministers, I see completely political motives in pursuing them now. If Congress would start really investigating its own waste and foolishness I might take their self-righteousness a lot more seriously.

I am reminded though that judgment begins at the house of God. I expect this is only the beginning of some cleaning. Unfortunately, it will likely also serve as ammunition for those who claim you cannot trust what God has written, including those within the church who are the most loudly proclaiming false prophets in this context. These people fail to take God's promises of provision and blessing above that seriously. Instead they claim that we can never know what God is going to do.

If God hadn't written it, they might be right, but they ignore countless confirmation of the blessing nature of God. I plan on writing more on this in the future, so I will leave this argument incomplete now.

I do wonder if I am one of the few people who believe as I do though. I a firmly convinced it is God's will for people to prosper and I believe it is sin for so many Christians today to not do so. Most of this failure to prosper is more due to slavery to debt than the will of God that many claim. People do struggle, but how many of those are spending hours in front of the television instead of improving themselves? How many are working 6 days as noted in Genesis? (The sixth day could be spend building a business idea improving themselves for a promotion, etc.)

More to come on this....

Brad

Getting Into Debt?

Earlier this summer I decided to do some work on the house that really needed to be done, but which caused me to (temporarily) increase my debt load.

We had done several things a summer ago, including resurfacing our pool. This left the concrete around the pool in a very poor state. We made it through last winter (a mild one here), though I was concerned about water getting into the open cracks between the nice "new" pool and the concrete this winter. So I found someone who could do the whole job for a very good price. The problem was I figured we should also replace our driveway which was starting to get some serious and large cracks, to the point I was concerned about a tire getting caught on one of the cracks. I also figured I should raise the "patio" floor a few inches to keep water out (which would flood part of it when a heavy rain came). We were already pouring concrete anyway, right?

Well, a $7K project went to about $17K, though we now have pretty good drainage and a lot of good concrete now. The driveway also has room for my daughter's car as well. Now I just have to work to pay all this off.

We did decide to close in the patio as well. The added square footage should increase the value of our home beyond the price of that area, though it may also increase my taxes in the long run. :(

While we may do some smaller things, including inside and outside painting, our major renovation push is over.

The partial moral to this story is that a deal on a fixer upper house may not be such a deal if you are not good fixing things up yourself. While I believe we got our house below market value, we have easily put much more than the difference into it since then. Looking at historical price guesses (such as at zillow.com) indicates it was worth much less than we thought when we bought it. Either way, we have not gained much value in the time we have lived here.

While my last post was about my newly found desire to get out of debt, I really need to stir up that desire again. It is very easy to lose the focus and fall back into old, bad habits.

The good news is that my wife and I like the house, so we plan on staying a while and enjoying all these renovations. :)

Brad

Why You Should Give Your Life Away

I have been reading a lot about personal finance recently, as I have finally gotten serious about getting out of debt.

A recent post on The Simple Dollar leads to a good discussion of if someone is really "good" if they only think about themselves. I see a common claim, in many areas of life, that you can be a "good person" even if you don't do X, Y or Z. While that may be true, I think a lot of it is based on our skewed value of what "good" is. Saying someone who never gives anything outside of themselves is "good" seems a bit in error to me. Of course you can do good things and be pleasant to be around, but are you really doing anything to justify your taking up space on this planet.

I suppose I could go with the libertarian argument that you are enabling others to work for your consumption, but life should be about more than just taking care of yourself. Since I reject the evolutionary philosophy, I also reject the idea that just caring for yourself is a valid approach to life. (This would be the so-called selfish gene.)

It also is an issue of what is really good. That is something I may post about later.

Brad

Keeping Up to Date is Hard to Do....

So much for my committment to write regularly, at least so far. I haven't given up, but I figure I may as well write about why keeping a blog going is much more of a challenge than it seems at first.

The main problem is that you have to write something. That means you have to consciously break your routine and post something. While this may become simpler once this is a true part of my routine, I am finding it harder to fit in one more thing than I thought I would.

You also need to cover some useful topic. That is also a challenge. I am full of ideas, but figuring out which ones to discuss here is another challenge. Though that is not completely accurate. I can do stream-of-consciousness writing at almost any point if I have overcome the first hurdle of making the time for it as noted above. The problem here is that such writing is not always that worthwhile to read. In fact, I don't know how this will come across since I am creating it on the fly.

Though I think I will reach my goal of blogging better if I just start writing. The way you master something is to start doing it. The refinement can come later. Whether anyone reads this or not is another story, but that is not my concern now. :)

Brad

Time to Start This Up Again

I have let this blog lapse. Life has a way of being more important than my own ramblings. :)

A big question is if life is really busier today. We certainly do not have to scramble most of our waking hours for food anymore. Most of us are even beyond needing to work the Biblically proscribed "6 days." Most of us have more time than we really realize - we just waste a lot of it. I am bad at this at times. Over the holiday I found myself playing rather pointless games of Age of Kings (AOE2). I managed to fritter a way a good portion of my holiday beating up on the computer.

While many people play for a challenge, I just play to beat up on the computer for a while. This seems fun enough to me, and I still like that the best of all the "Age" games. (I own AOE3 and my son got the expansion for Christmas, but I haven't tried it yet.)

It makes me wonder how many others are like me? The magazines and websites are full of people who want to play the ultimate challenge, but how many are like me and just want to relax for a bit and beat up the computer.

Another one of my top games is Settlers IV, though it does not have an "easy" mode or any really good cheats. Playing through a game of it can eat up the good part of a day or two, as I end up botching it and keep restarting (along the way or at the beginning) until I figure the correct strategy. I always tend to build too many things and end up slowing myself down while they are completed.

I do wish the bugs in this game could be fixed. While it isn't perfect, it remains a fun game and is a good diversion from the normal conquer the world games.

Enough comments on this for now. :)

Brad